I'm dragging today. I'm really fighting the fatigue. The easiest way to explain fatigue is to imagine what it would feel like to carry around a cement block in each of your limbs and one in your chest, then throw some thick mud in your brain box and try to think through it and move.
The only reason I'm explaining fatigue is until I experienced it, I didn't have a clue as to what it really meant. I use to think it just meant you were really really tired. I always figured people with fatigue just needed to buck up and push through it. Boy, was I ever wrong. I didn't have a clue. I was wrong.

My heart rate is still running a little high. Today it ranged from 98 to 112. I got up at 6:30 and fixed breakfast and made Dan's lunch and his two snacks. It was all I could do to stay up until he left at 7:30. (If I lay down before Dan goes to work, he worry's all day and calls a lot. I've learned not to lay down until he actually leaves. I hate to worry him for nothing.) So, I fell asleep and slept really hard until my home med monitor nurse system started going off at 9am. She hollers at me every five to ten minutes for 1/2 an hour until I either get on the scale or my 1/2 hour is up.)

I sat up on the couch for about 1/2 an hour trying to wake up. I took Ozzie outside for a little while and then came back in and rested on the couch until Ozzie wanted to go back out an hour later. It was just a struggle all day to get my act together. My heart rate really started messing with me this afternoon and I became really, really fatigued. But, I went to the ice rink. Thank goodness for Ellie. We had our private lesson and then she helped me to teach my power class.

On days like this, I must admit that giving up skating and everything else seems so much easier than to fight the fatigue to sit up let alone walk around. But, I know I won't feel this bad everyday. It is just my body readjusting to the meds and getting them back into my system. But, fighting the up and down heart rate, the low blood pressure and and the fatigue makes me feel bad.

Sorry this post is so depressing. I'm just having one of those days. It will be better tomorrow. Tomorrow I skate for an hour and then have AWANA's at church.

Right now, I just want to sleep. I've managed to stay up this long, only because Dan, Ozzie and Max have taken over the entire bed. They do look darn cute.